This is my now

Its been a year since Iost my job at the sheriff's office.
A YEAR. 365 DAYS.

I'll admit, I was afraid at first. I had no clue what I would I do next. There were days (and many nights) I found myself in tears. I felt unworthy for so many reasons. I had let a job define my worth. A JOB! I remember praying that the Lord would bless me with a job. Any job. I was willing to settle. Looking back, I wonder where I would be if He had of answered that prayer. Definitely not here...
Where is here? Here is finding out who I am. Here is finding out what makes me happy. Here is being able to spend more time with my son. Here is not having to sacrifice my health, sanity, faith, or life for a job.

Soon after losing my job, I was given the opportunity to be able to work with children. I was nervous. Actually, that's an understatement. That opportunity turned into a huge blessing.  Over the past year I have grown so close to some amazing children, whom I feel are my own. On Monday, I start on my third degree... a teacher certificate. After 7 years of crimina justice, a lot of people think I'm crazy. But I feel like this is where I am supposed to be. In fact, I know it is. I find myself missing my students, I never missed any inmates. I have a chance to change lives. I have to the chance to make an impact on a child's life (in a good way). The inmates were usually too far gone. I love being out in public and having these little munchkins run up to me with smiles and his, instead of ducking and dodging ex inmates. It feels amazing to be appreciated. It feels great to say I have a career, not a job.
Sure, I'm afraid of this new chapter. But I'm hella excited too!  I know that God will guide me and keep me, so I'm not worried. Right here. Right now. This is where I am supposed to be!